Happy New Year!

GUESS WHAT, KIDS! This is a cliché New Years post! So sit down, grab a diet coke, snuggle a dachshund, and just get ready to soak in all of this cliché.

2012 was a big year for me. I learned a lot about myself and I started a new major with a new journey. There were a lot of fun moments and a few sad ones, but there was always something to take away from them that made me a better person because of it. Looking back, I don’t think I would change anything about 2012.

Well, maybe one thing, but even with that I’m learning a lot about myself and I don’t think that I would have gotten the opportunity to learn about it unless it would have happened. I’m learning about how independent I am and am not. I’m learning that what I want for myself needs to come first sometimes. I’m learning things that I probably should know about myself before I get married. Do I wish I could have learned these lessons with Nick? Of course I do. But as much as I would like to, I cannot change what happened. I learned a lot when I was with Nick and I am thankful for all of the time that I had with him. Do I wish things ended differently? Of course. I loved him and I loved our relationship. But I can’t do anything to change what happened. I’ve done so much growing in the past four months and that’s something that I am really thankful for out of all of this. I definitely didn’t think that I would end this year single, but I know I’m not alone. I know I have a huge network of people who truly love and care about me.

2013 will be a year of growing and moving forward for me. I want to continue to grow and develop myself as a young adult and lay some groundwork for my life after college. I want to continue to strengthen the friendships I have now and work on the ones that need repair. I want to move forward and continue to learn from this break up with Nick. I want to keep looking forward and make new opportunities for myself and not dwell on the past, but use it to help me make decisions in the future. I’m excited for opportunities with school coming up in 2013 and excited to see where I will be this time next year.

I definitely never thought I would be where I am now when I was ringing in 2012, but I am happy where I am and I am happy with who I am. I am thankful for all the opportunites I had in 2012 and am so excited for the opportunities to come in 2013. 

Happy New Years, everybody!

Thoughts on Grad School

You know what is really scary to me? Graduate school. You know what’s even more scary? The fact that I only have 3 more semesters to figure out where I’m going, what I’m actually going to get a masters in, and take the GRE.

Now, I realize that the GRE is nothing compared to the MCAT or LSAT or whatever you take to get into dental school, but it’s still a pretty big deal. It certainly can help or not help with scholarships. Do you even get scholarships for grad school? I feel like this is such a huge mystery for me because none of my siblings went to grad school. Sure my sister-in-law went to law school but that is completely different. I feel like I’m wandering around my house alone in the dark with no flash light and no phone and I’m just reaching around trying not to bump into walls.

How I feel about the grad school process.

In a perfect world, I would get two masters: one in teaching and one in history. Unfortunately, you can’t get a masters in teaching unless you have a bachelors in teaching, which if you ask me is dumb. But the gods of higher education didn’t ask me and thus I cannot get a masters in teaching. I’m discovering that it is probably best for me to get a masters in public history for the museum aspect of what I want to do so at least I kind of have my foot in the door there.

Meanwhile, there’s still the huge question of “WHERE THE HECK AM I GONNA GO?!” Obviously, I want to go to a good school, but again I am COMPLETELY lost as to what is a good graduate school for History majors. It’s all just really confusing, so I guess I need to do more research.

And yes, I realize this completely goes against my post where I said I wasn’t going to worry about things as much, but I actually have some control over this. And it’s a huge deal. So I feel like a little worrying and a little being scared is okay. I’m moving towards the unknown here!

Until next time!

Christmas

Just a short post about Christmas today.

We had a great Christmas in Austin, Tx with my sister. Austin is a very strange place, but I'm glad that my sister likes it and it makes her happy. We got back to Shreveport today, and hopefully will get to see my brother soon. I am so thankful and blessed to be able to spend time with my family and receive the gifts they give me. 

Merry Christmas, y'all!

It Is What It Is: Finals and End of the Semester Reflections

Finals. The ultimate test to see that you didn’t actually learn anything this semester. Finals are the ultimate stress maker and ultimate sleep depriver. This year I at least had people in my classes that I could study with to make it a little less stressful. Oddly enough I wasn’t as stressed about it this semester as I have been. Maybe it’s because I actually understand what I’m doing for once. Maybe it’s because I’ve finally gotten into the groove of school, even if I am a little late to the party. Or maybe it’s because of what I think has become my motto for this semester:

It is what it is.

If you know me, you know I am a huge worry wart. You know that I worry about anything and everything going on in my life. This semester was a roller coaster full of things that I never expected. The biggest, obviously, was Nick and I breaking up. Not to mention classes, a new job, discovering things about grad school, and plenty of other things to worry about. Through everything, though, I have learned that worrying isn’t going to change anything. I think that’s my biggest accomplishment for this semester. Yes, I am still dealing with getting over this break up. Yes, some days I do still get sad. And yes, I do still wish that things were different. But worrying about all of that is going to get me nowhere. It’s not going to make Nick come back. It’s not going to make me feel any better to mope and worry about what might have been. There isn’t anything that I can do about what is happening between he and I. There isn’t anything I can do to change it.

 It is what it is.

All I can do is hold my head up high and be myself. Whatever is meant to be will happen, and worry about what is or is not going to happen isn’t going to change a darn thing.

As far as school goes, I have never been more relaxed about a semester than I have been this time. I know that I work my butt off for school. I know that I study hard and at the end of the day…

It is what it is.

I can’t do anything more that what is my best. As long as I study hard and as long as I continue to push myself, I can’t ask for anything more.

This semester has been challenging both emotionally and scholastically, but I learned a lot and I had fun. I can’t say I wouldn’t change anything because that’s not entirely true, but with all things considered it was definitely a semester for the books. I think I kicked ass this semester. I’m excited to see what next semester has in store, and I’m excited to move forward. 

Winterfest

December 6 marked our last concert of the semester. It was our Winterfest concert and it was seriously amazing. The Children’s Choir, Concert Choir, and Schola performed their Christmassy best and it was wonderful. Of course and as usual my awesome parents were in attendance with a pretty full house! I think this is the first time that we have ever run out of programs at a concert, so that was pretty exciting to see for Schola. Hopefully this trend will continue! I really am so thankful that my parents have come to literally every single concert we’ve had since I began singing in Schola three years ago. Being from out of state, I know a lot of parents of Scholans don’t have this opportunity to come see their kids, so I am truly thankful and honored that my parents are able and completely thrilled to come to our concerts. 

AND NOW FOR SOME SHAMELESS SELF PROMOTION!

If you didn’t get to make it to the Christmas concert HERE is one of the pieces we performed, "Betelehemu." It’s probably one of my favorite songs we have done in my Schola career. Next semester if you’re in the Fayetteville area be sure to come check out one of our concerts then. Lots of exciting things are planned!!

PS: Be sure to "like" University of Arkansas Schola Cantorum on Facebook!

Dead Day

December 7. OFFICIALLY the last day of the semester AKA Dead Day, AKA a day of celebration! But what are we celebrating you ask? The end of the semester, a great semester for choir, just being done, Christmas is coming, you name it. It can also be argued that Dead Day is a day to mourn the end of your life before finals week starts.

SO on December 7, I went to not only Schola’s end of the year Christmas party, but also AOII’s semi formal. Both were WONDERFUL as expected.

The night began with Schola’s Christmas party. Of course it was Tacky Sweater themed and there were some AWESOME spectacles. My personal favorites were Molly’s Christmas cat denim shirt and Mallory’s claymation Rudolf the Red Nosed Reindeer sweatshirt. People brought all kinds of food and desserts, and once dinner was over there was a great game of White Elephant with some truly hilarious gifts. Choir people really are their own breed. After White Elephant was over, I had to leave a smidgen early to get ready for….

unfortunately missed the group shot, but still I love 'em!

SEMI FORMAL!

Semi is probably one of my favorite functions that we have every year. I really love being girly and getting dressed up and feeling pretty. I went with a good friend of mine from high school, Matt Light, and we had SO much fun! It was nice to go with someone who I’ve known for a really long time and just get to be goofy and dance like a fool all night. I had a fabulous time with all of my girls and their dates. We took tons of pictures which you can refer to my Facebook if you would like to see more.

Love these girls

Matt and I

This Dead Day was a ton of fun and was really special. I’m so happy that I got to spend it having a great time with great friends.

Until next time!

It's been SO long!

WOW! I can't even believe it has been since THANKSGIVING that I last posted! I feel like it's been a million years since I last wrote in my blog. I've missed it. I have a LOT to write about so, clearly, I'm not going to put it all in this post. I need to some to process and get my thoughts together but we'll get caught up!

Here's a list of things to look forward to!

• Reflections on fall semester
• Semi-formal
• Finals
• My new job
• Heading home for the holidays
• Choir Christmas party
• Christmas Concert

Man, typing out that list it looks like not that much has happened in the weeks between Thanksgiving and Christmas break, but I feel like SO MUCH happened!

See you soon!!