Hello everyone! I’ve debated making this blog for a while,
and after the past few weeks I think I’ve finally decided what the hell, I should do it.
I don’t know if anyone besides my mom will read it, but who cares lets give it
a shot.
I guess the biggest thing going on in my life right now is
getting over this break up. Its funny how that works. I don’t know what happened
to cause his feelings to change and I don’t think I ever will, which is hard,
but I didn’t change myself and I have to respect that Nick needs to be happy
also. That’s all I ever wanted for him. I’m not going to be mad because he did
nothing but be honest with me, and that’s all I ever wanted. Do I necessarily
agree with it? No, but that’s life. Dwelling on it will get me nowhere.
So now what?
I feel like this is the weirdest process. One day I’ll be
completely okay with being alone and the next day everything reminds me of Nick
and I cant stop crying. I think that’s part of healing. Which, I guess, is what
I’m doing, and as long as I continue to have more good days than bad I think I'm doing okay. I think the worst part about it is I want my best friend back more
than anything. But we’ll get there. We both truly loved each other, and I don’t
think that will ever go away. Sometimes love just changes.
Meanwhile, I’ve discovered and gotten a new appreciation for
the people in my life. I have been showered with more love and support than I
thought was possible from friends and family. For that I am truly thankful.
While this transition period is scary, I know that it’s just
a new plan. I don’t know what is going to happen next but I’ll figure it out.
After all isn’t that what college is all about? My plan is just going to be a
little different now. I’m getting
there.
